The Holy Spirit's Nudge in Mothering

My daughter mentioned that a girl in school recommended she read a particular book which she was able to pick up at the middle school library. My radar did not immediately go up because it was a book in the school library. However, that alone should have been cause for me to question it.

Anyway, I noticed that she would go into her room and lock the door whenever she was reading it. She said it was to keep her little sister out so she could read in peace in quiet. Still, no alarm going off in my head.

In my prayer time yesterday, I asked God to give me a heart for my children's needs and to know what areas of their character, etc. might need some guidance. Well, after supper last night she is back behind a locked door reading this book and I paused to contemplate that and felt the Holy Spirit's nudge to get in there and review that book.

I asked her to scooch over so I could lay on the bed with her and read along with her which is something she normally loves to do but not this time. She instead handed me the book, almost with a sense of relief, and walked out of the room to play. I sat down and began to read.

The book is titled Thirteen Reason Why by Jay Asher. It is about a girl who committed suicide and left behind these cassette tapes talking about why she did it and a boy finds them and listens to them and discovers he is part of the reason why she did. So topic number one that I don't want my daughter reading about is suicide.

Topics 2,3,4 are bullying, partying/drinking to the point of puking and passing out/and rape! I was just about sick. She is in the sixth grade and this book was in her school library.

I asked her what she had read so far and she said pretty much the same stuff I had read. I went in my room and prayed and cried because I was angry that my daughter had lost part of her innocence with what she had read - about people, about the world, about hope, and about the beautiful nature of sex in the way God designed it to be. I didn't even have "the talk" with her yet. It's all skewed now by the world's ugliness and Satan's lies and activities. I was heartbroken.

God reminded me that Hunter had signed a purity covenant last year though church and I went and dug it out. Together, we reread it out loud, talked about why reading this book went against what God wanted us to do, and that we needed to ask him to forgive us and restore us. She agreed and we prayed, for her, for me, and for all the other kids at school who may read this book. She, then, asked if she could resign the covenant. I thought it was a great idea and showed a recommitment to the covenant she made with God and I felt she was sincere in her repentance.

She knew it was wrong to read it but she got caught up in the lure of what Satan had to offer. That's how he works. He's a deceiver, a liar, and destroyer. She needed her mom to step in and pull her away and she was grateful for the rescue.

Today, I read the reviews on-line of this book, and so many people tout it as the best book written on suicide. In the back of the book, the author has a question/answer section,and in one of his answers he says:

Some people, primarily adults, would rather there be no books dealing with controversial subjects, even if those books help start a dialogue between teens and adults. Thankfully, I've heard from a lot of parents and teachers and librarians who are using this book for that very reason."

Well, my daughter would have read it with NO DIALOGUE, if the Holy Spirit wouldn't have stepped in, because it was chosen for the MIDDLE school library for kids to check out and read for fun. It is not that kind of dialogue I want my innocent daughter to be having at this age. I don't know how books are chosen for these libraries but I do know they are not chosen with the best interest of our children in mind. At least, not a biblical best interest, maybe a worldly one, but not a biblical one.

Next year, our daughter will be home schooled. This book, and others like it, will not grace the shelves of our school library! That decision does not make me foolish as the world would like to claim that I am but rather it makes me wise and discerning and God-Fearing.

Lessons learned:

1. A parent cannot effectively parent without being led by the Holy Spirit to be made aware of those things we would not see or overlook.

2. Other people cannot have the same level of interest in my daughter that I have nor do they want to protect her like I do. I am the best person to raise and educate my children.

3. Satan is so deceptive and clever. EVERYTHING must be examined through the lens of God's Word before determining good. If it doesn't hold up to God's Word it's a lie or a trap! Don't let Satan lull you into complacency in your parenting. Guard yourselves, too. There is so much that on the surface looks good, sounds good, everyone else has bought into as good, etc. that ISN'T. Don't fall victim to Satan's deceit.

4. Forgiveness is available when we fail, fall down, retreat, etc. We need to seek it, ask to be restored and healed, and then move on. Don't give up doing what is good because of a temporary setback. God can make everything new again, give hope where hope was lost, and give you strength to start anew. He has the power to guard and keep you.

This is the message the book fails to give but it is the only message that really has the power to overcome the world's lies!